You pronounce your P’s as B’s (bebsi, bolice)
A visa is not a credit card.
You ask your dad a simple question, and he answers by telling the story of how he used to walk miles just to get to school.
Your dad swears at you with words that affect himself (Ibn kalb!!!)
Your aunt is always asking when she can dance at your wedding.
Music video clips are like German porn channels
You or your relatives own a grocery store, liquor store, restaurant, or gas station
You put olive oil in and on everything and brag about how healthy it is.
At parties, you think it's cool to dance and smoke at the same time
You act like you want to pay, but in reality you hate to pay
Your middle name is your father's first name
You have a difficult Arabic name so you come up with cheesy Americanized version of it like "Sam" or "Mike"
You get really happy and call the whole family to the room when you there is a special on Arabs on CNN
Your favorite food is wara' dawali (Grape Leaves), but you are embarrassed to tell your friends that you ate leaves for dinner
Your father is a doctor or engineer.
You have a Persian rug in every room.
You have an endless supply of pistachios, dates, and pumpkin seeds.
You actually like yogurt drinks.
Your parents say you're becoming Americanized anytime you get into trouble.
You hug and kiss relatives you have never seen before in your life.
You curse at your teachers or strangers in Arabic.
You wonder whether a cute girl is Arabic and go up to ask her just to start a conversation
You have to constantly remind your American friends to take off their shoes when they enter your house